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Before the affair, I'd often worn pants until the cuffs were stringy and the lap was spotted with olive oil from eating salad at my desk; I had begun to muffin out of some of them as well.

Sometimes my wife just threw my pants out and ordered new ones online—in black, so they would be harder to ruin. Almost as soon as I began to understand that my wife was having an affair and was imagining a whole new life for herself, I started to lose weight.

Tim can't change history, but he can change what happens and has happened in his own life—so he decides to make his world a better place..getting a girlfriend.

Three weeks after my wife told me she was having an affair, I decided to buy a pair of new pants.

For a functional adult under normal circumstances, this wouldn't be much of an event, but I'd never been able to buy much of anything for myself—and all kinds of everyday actions had recently taken on layers of meaning.

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